Three months ago our second child, Teddy, was born. It's a few hours to his actual "birthday" but I'm going to write about it now because his older brother is occupied and Teddy is sleeping.
Three months ago I went in for a regular checkup, I was overdue, but didn't think I'd be having a baby that day for sure. Eight hours later (give or take) I was holding the newest member of our little family. Life changes pretty fast sometimes.
I was so excited to finally be holding Teddy, to finally meet this new little person and at the same time I felt a horrible guilt that I was taking something away from our older son, Brian. Brian himself showed some significant reticence towards his new brother. In the hospital he wouldn't look at him, hold him, nothing.
It's gotten better since we've been home. He has warmed up to his brother considerably since that first day in the hospital. He likes to play with him on the floor, give him his pacifier, and give me status updates on his moods and diapers. He also likes to translate Teddy's baby speech into actual words. For instance, something like "Ahhhhblpppt" might translate into "I think Teddy wants to watch Cars." Still not sure that's what Teddy says, but it's cute to watch Brian speak for him.
My guilt is mostly gone now. I can see most days that instead of taking something away from Brian, I had given him something wonderful. A relationship that will last his lifetime, a friend he can always turn to, someone to share the frustration of having James and I for parents with. I gave him a brother, a relationship I never had but always wanted. I am so excited to see how they grow together.
And Teddy himself. I don't know what I expected, but he has been so much more than anything I could have imagined. He has been patient beyond belief. Almost immediately after his birth I returned to school full-time and he didn't miss a trick. We never had problems nursing, never had trouble bonding. He is the sweetest, calmest child.
I can only really describe him in contrasts. When Brian was a baby he was always alert, awake, and wanting to be doing something with someone. He is the ultimate extrovert. He never minded being passed around and held by new people, he wasn't happy unless he was with someone, and even when he was mostly immobile you could tell it wouldn't be long until he was doing something.
Teddy is his opposite. He has been more sleepy, more relaxed, more calm. He slept for almost 14 hours after he was born and I had to work really hard to get him to wake up. He will only tolerate being handed around for a short time before he starts to get upset and fuss. He is totally happy playing by himself for up to an hour. He loves to snuggle and doesn't much care what's going on around him. If you went by potential careers, Brian is my high powered executive, Teddy is my quiet artist.
We're slowly starting to get the hang of having another little person in the house. We're figuring out how his personality fits into our world. I love seeing him play with his dad. I love seeing Brian try to help him stop fussing. I love waking up to his gummy grin every morning. Equilibrium is slowly being restored.
This last three months has been exhausting, frustrating, challenging, and a revelation. I can't imagine our lives without our newest little boy, he is a gift.
So happy three months little man! Looking forward to the rest of your life!
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