You never get used to it

I had a really strange dream this morning. Not the usual brain processing what happened the day before, but something that really had nothing at all to do with anything going on. It was really weird.
To be fair, I usually have some pretty weird dreams, you could say my subconscious really puts an interesting spin on the day's events. Every once in a while though, I get one that just seems out of left field.
I don't know how many of you think dreams mean something other than the scientific explanation. I do think that on occasion, dreams can be messages, flashes of insight into things that are clouded and confused. Many times I have awoken from a particularly dream-filled night to find that I understand a situation better or a solution to a problem has been made clear. Other times it seems like the message is cloudy, or garbled. This dream was one of those.
Once upon a time I had an aunt who was really good at deciphering dreams. Whenever I had one that I just couldn't understand she would help me make sense of it. She didn't even have to know everything going on in my life. She would just know what it all meant.
She died this year.
So when I woke up this morning and went: "Aunt Beth will know what that meant," and then a minute later, "Oh, right. She can't give me the answers anymore."  And my heart sank. And I had a moment of loss, all over again. I know many of my family are struggling with her loss. I'm sure many of her friends are, too.
I didn't live near my aunt. She wasn't part of my everyday life. But I knew she was there.  She shared pictures and achievements from my cousin. Once I had kids I shared pictures and stories with her. I always thought we would have time, time to visit, time to email, time to share.  And then rather suddenly it seems that time was up.  So every once in a while, something pops up and I think of Beth. And then I remember she's gone.
It still hasn't really sunk in I guess. Or maybe, you never get used to losing someone. The hole they leave never really gets filled in. You just learn to walk around it.
I miss my aunt.